Frustrated!!!

[RobertDougherty56]

I keep getting frustrated when I am messing up and give up for the day. Should I slow it down and keep trying or try something else? I know Brian Sr says perfect practice makes perfect, but i can do the scales and chord changes slowly but when I increase the bpm on the metronome even by say 10beats I start rushing and messing up.
Also, when I try the A minor pentatonic scale from the early lesson I am struggling to get a clean note sound on the second note with my pinky?

 

[Ed Seith]

For one, always end on perfect. What does that mean? It means if you're practicing a certain passage, you should play it 80 at a comfortable speed, then 10-15% at a speed slightly higher than comfortable, where you are a lot more likely to mess up, then the last 5-10% back at a comfortable speed. Once back at that comfort speed, make sure your LAST repetition of the exercise is played perfectly. That way, the perfection seals in like butter.

Frustration is bad. Once you're frustrated, you're only likely to get worse until you take a break and relax. Frustration is anxiety and anxiety tenses your muscles.

 

[summit]

For one, always end on perfect. What does that mean? It means if you're practicing a certain passage, you should play it 80 at a comfortable speed, then 10-15% at a speed slightly higher than comfortable, where you are a lot more likely to mess up, then the last 5-10% back at a comfortable speed. Once back at that comfort speed, make sure your LAST repetition of the exercise is played perfectly. That way, the perfection seals in like butter.

Frustration is bad. Once you're frustrated, you're only likely to get worse until you take a break and relax. Frustration is anxiety and anxiety tenses your muscles.

Very much Agree.

Play slow and consitently. Speed will come.

 

[Lindsey]

I know tha frustration all to well. 10 bpm is a lot, built up speed slower. Increase by 1 or 2 bpm at the time. Go back to a slower speed when you need to.
Try the 1234 exercises to gain more control and strength over your pinky.

 

[federico igini]

[QUOTE = "RobertDougherty56, post: 35968, membro: 63068"]
Continuo a sentirmi frustrato quando sbaglio e mi arrendo per la giornata. Dovrei rallentarlo e continuare a provare o provare qualcos'altro? So che Brian Sr dice che la pratica perfetta rende perfetti, ma posso fare le scale e gli accordi cambiano lentamente ma quando aumento i bpm sul metronomo anche dicendo 10 battiti inizio a correre e fare casino.
Inoltre, quando provo la scala pentatonica minore A dalla prima lezione, sto lottando per ottenere un suono di nota pulito sulla seconda nota con il mio mignolo?
[/CITAZIONE]
L'uomo non correre! .. prenditi il tuo tempo, 10 bpm sono troppo ... il segreto è tenerlo lentamente fino a raggiungere la perfezione, quindi puoi aumentare i bpm di 2 o 3!

 

[Lucas Weiman]

What Lindsey said is very important, don't ever jump up by more than 3bpm at something that is moderate-to-hard in what you are improving on. You want to build a relaxed-feeling when you are playing, if you can't relax while you are playing it perfectly, you probably won't get better. Slow it down, become comfortable, make sure you are breathing while playing, relax your arms, hands, back and shoulder muscles. Make sure you are doing all these things BEFORE you bump up the metronome. Good luck! Also a video of you playing would be beneficial, we can critique your technique.

 

[Ben newton]

Perfect practice makes perfect is absolutely right but only when you know what it is you need to practice. Seems like a riddle really. When you know what you need to practice, practice becomes perfect. Thus, perfect practice = perfect.

I'd recommend keeping that speed down until you are fully comfortable bringing the speed up. Adjust technique if you have too. I have found that my picking technique for example has evolved over time. It just gradually changes. Sometimes I alt pick from the wrist and sometimes I have movement from my fingers. Don't hesitate to explore how you hold a pick or observe your posture etc. Takes a bit of time, but try and keep things varied. Avoid that frustration. Play some chords, some scales, arpeggios, learn a song, read a music book.

Remember to observe that frustration, allow yourself to take a moment, breath in, breath out and approach with a fresh mind.

 

[RobertDougherty56]

Thanks for everyones advice and tips very helpful. Will try and post a video so you can critique

 

[Brian Haner Sr.]

All good advice! 10bpm is a big jump if you can barely play something. 2 or 3 bpm is probably more realistic. I know. It's boring. But that's how it's done.
Also - I love Ed's advice. End on a good note. This is almost IMPOSSIBLE to do. It's like gambling in Vegas. Quit while you're ahead. The problem is - when you're ahead, you want to keep going. Ironically, that's when you lose, get frustrated and end up quitting.
Sooo - practice, and when you start to suck - back the bpm down 10bpm and play it perfectly. Then put the guitar down. You will feel good and motivated when it's time to pick it up again.
This is my advice to you, not necessarily anyone else. Everyone is different. I LOVE sucking and being frustrated to the point of screaming. I've embraced it. I get pissed off and power through it. That's my personality. For those who have a more "fuck you" attitude (like me) - just suck out loud, scream, and suck some more. I've done it enough to know I'll eventually nail it. My inner voice would horrify most people. I say terrible things to myself. But it motivates me to do better.
Some people respond to positive motivation. I seem to respond to self-ridicule. Not saying it's healthy! lol
I'm just sharing my method. Everyone has to practice to suit their personality.

 

[Ed Seith]

I can't tell you how many times I've said to myself in my head, "See? This is why you don't live-stream this shit, fucko."

 

[Brian Haner Sr.]

I can't tell you how many times I've said to myself in my head, "See? This is why you don't live-stream this shit, fucko."

Ha! I was thinking of you when I wrote that. I thought "Ed will get this for sure".
We are a different breed, my friend.

 

[Ed Seith]

The funny thing is, I *know* my playing has suffered for this mentality, but I am hardwired... to self-destruct. YEAH!

 

[AGA]

The funny thing is, I *know* my playing has suffered for this mentality, but I am hardwired... to self-destruct. YEAH!

So interesting, I always had a way healthier mindset when it came to singing than guitar and it took me many years to re-wire my guitar mindset to change and be positive. My playing also suffered from my old mindset so I knew I had to do something about it.

Interestingly enough, and I hope you don't mind me saying this, but I think you are a way better player than you give yourself credit for, you just get in your own head sometimes. When you let yourself be your playing is kick ass Ed! I can always tell in your metal minutes when you are enjoying yourself.

 

[Ed Seith]

So interesting, I always had a way healthier mindset when it came to singing than guitar and it took me many years to re-wire my guitar mindset to change and be positive. My playing also suffered from my old mindset so I knew I had to do something about it.

Interestingly enough, and I hope you don't mind me saying this, but I think you are a way better player than you give yourself credit for, you just get in your own head sometimes. When you let yourself be your playing is kick ass Ed! I can always tell in your metal minutes when you are enjoying yourself.

Thanks, Ailee. I do know very much that the inside of my brain is my biggest obstacle, worst critic, and harshest enemy. In all seriousness, I had restructured my health insurance this year to make it more appealing and cost-effective to get into therapy, and that's on hold with quarantine stuff. I want to get inside my own head and figure stuff out (with a guide), but I know I would not be able to do that from my house with everyone home, so it has to wait until everyone goes back to school IN A BUILDING. Thanks!!!

 

[Ed Seith]

I also do have a self-deprecating sense of humor (If I can't laugh at myself, I can't laugh at other people, right? And I *LOVE* laughing at other people!), and I suppose the fact that I'm frequently joking about myself doesn't come through in the written word.

 

[AGA]

Thanks, Ailee. I do know very much that the inside of my brain is my biggest obstacle, worst critic, and harshest enemy. In all seriousness, I had restructured my health insurance this year to make it more appealing and cost-effective to get into therapy, and that's on hold with quarantine stuff. I want to get inside my own head and figure stuff out (with a guide), but I know I would not be able to do that from my house with everyone home, so it has to wait until everyone goes back to school IN A BUILDING. Thanks!!!

That's awesome to hear! Therapy is seriously the best investment of time and money, I hope this situation ends soon so you can do it. My step dad is a counselor so I've been really fortunate to have him through the years to figure shit out.

 

[Carlos Owens]

I keep getting frustrated when I am messing up and give up for the day. Should I slow it down and keep trying or try something else? I know Brian Sr says perfect practice makes perfect, but i can do the scales and chord changes slowly but when I increase the bpm on the metronome even by say 10beats I start rushing and messing up.
Also, when I try the A minor pentatonic scale from the early lesson I am struggling to get a clean note sound on the second note with my pinky?

Guitar is like 200% mental job my dude. If frustrated, give your mind a break.

Also, check your 2 hand sync! Give it a shot to practice both hands individually and them synch them together, that works magic.

Most importantly, be sure to enjoy the guitar always man. We all struggle from time to time, never give up and never stop enjoying the guitar!

 

[Chris Johnston]

Hey Robert! There's not much to add after everyone's comments here as they are spot on.

I've totally been where you are before and not that long ago too! The best advice I can give is to really take your time and try (as hard as it may be) to be kind to yourself, at every stage. Guitar isn't a race, it's a journey that you're supposed to be enjoying instead of beating yourself up!

Treat yourself like a student that is paying you good money to keep them positive and motivated. Learn to recognize when you're getting frustrated and pause right there. Take a deep breath, it is really is only music. You'll be surprised how quickly you improve when you stop putting pressure on yourself and just start getting lost in improving the little things.

If something starts annoying you (which it definitely will!) try and steer your focus to what you can already do (that 1000's of others can't do, that have never even touched a guitar, or have it sitting collecting dust) - You're actually hitting the grind and trying to improve your craft, and your frustration only shows your passion for the instrument - which is a really positive thing! Your passion and drive will sail you through the whole process in one way or another.

Remember: Playing anything on a guitar is by no means a natural ability of the human body, so it says absolutely nothing about your worth as a person if you struggle with something! Every guitar player you'll ever look up to or feel jealous of feels frustrated about something in their playing.

For me, mindset is everything when playing your instrument. Your mindset determines your attitude to what you're doing, and your attitude 100% effects how quickly and effectively you will learn and progress on your instrument - nothing else.

So In a nutshell: Be kind to yourself, Don't Compare Yourself to others, Be proud of how far you've come & Enjoy the learning process!

 

[AGA]

Hey Robert! There's not much to add after everyone's comments here as they are spot on.

I've totally been where you are before and not that long ago too! The best advice I can give is to really take your time and try (as hard as it may be) to be kind to yourself, at every stage. Guitar isn't a race, it's a journey that you're supposed to be enjoying instead of beating yourself up!

Treat yourself like a student that is paying you good money to keep them positive and motivated. Learn to recognize when you're getting frustrated and pause right there. Take a deep breath, it is really is only music. You'll be surprised how quickly you improve when you stop putting pressure on yourself and just start getting lost in improving the little things.

If something starts annoying you (which it definitely will!) try and steer your focus to what you can already do (that 1000's of others can't do, that have never even touched a guitar, or have it sitting collecting dust) - You're actually hitting the grind and trying to improve your craft, and your frustration only shows your passion for the instrument - which is a really positive thing! Your passion and drive will sail you through the whole process in one way or another.

Remember: Playing anything on a guitar is by no means a natural ability of the human body, so it says absolutely nothing about your worth as a person if you struggle with something! Every guitar player you'll ever look up to or feel jealous of feels frustrated about something in their playing.

For me, mindset is everything when playing your instrument. Your mindset determines your attitude to what you're doing, and your attitude 100% effects how quickly and effectively you will learn and progress on your instrument - nothing else.

So In a nutshell: Be kind to yourself, Don't Compare Yourself to others, Be proud of how far you've come & Enjoy the learning process!

I love everything you said! Beautiful and wise words!

 

[Chris Johnston]

I love everything you said! Beautiful and wise words!

Thanks Ailee!